So what I said last year when I watched the first Twilight movie at the behest of Silvery Dude was that one of the reasons I hadn’t wanted to see it was because I thought I would be easily seduced by the over-the-top-Gothic-romanticism and the sparkliness of the vampires, and that I might (as someone old enough to be his mother) develop an inappropriate attachment to R-Patz.

And so it has come to pass.

For I wasn’t dared to watch Twilight: New Moon at all. This was totally of my own doing. We aren’t going to go into the detail of how I came to have a copy of this on DVD in the first place, but suffice to say that the Book God was off at a conference, I had been working at home and been incredibly grumpy all day and thought this might cheer me up, a view supported by His Silveriness who said it would make me smile.

And he was right, although it should be noted that when he and his wife watched it earlier in the summer his considered view was that it was “utter pap” followed this week by “all I remember is big dogs running through the woods”.

Great art always leaves a lasting impression, I find.

Oh and before we get into the stuff that stuck with me please note that however I came to have this DVD in my possession I certainly didn’t get the two disc special edition. Sad I may be, but not that sad. It’s just a nicer picture, honest. More R-Patz and a bit of K-Stew sexy-face.

So plot stuff. God, well it carries on from the end of the last film. Bella still wants to be vampirised, Edward doesn’t want to do the deed, there’s the whole Victoria still out for revenge thing which means Edward spurns Bella and goes off in a brooding fashion for her own protection and she’s thick enough to believe he doesn’t love her (duh!) so sulks for America and then cozies up to Jacob who turns out to be a dog. No, really, a dog. And then there’s the “if I put myself in danger I see Edward so that’s what I’ll do then” approach to life from Bella. And then it just gets too much to explain until we get to Italy and the Volturi. Now they are proper vampires, more blood-sucking, less moodiness. And lots of red, which I’m liking very much.

Anyway, the standouts:

  • Disappointment – no Eclipse clips!
  • Sparkly right from the outset – how fab
  • “Bella, you give me everything just by breathing”
  • R-Patz quotes Shakespeare. At length. Yay for iambic pentameter!
  • Vamps can be photographed – who knew?
  • “That changes things. A lot.”
  • Lots of glowering from the shirtless ones, and let’s face it if you are going to fall asleep alone in the woods you may as well be rescued by biceps on legs (yes I know biceps are on arms, but…. oh never mind)
  • “The pain is my only reminder that he was real”
  • “You’re sorta beautiful” “How hard did you hit your head?”
  • Very, very big dogs – puppy power!!!
  • “Your lack of confidence in us is a little insulting”
  • “I’ve never met anyone more prone to life-threatening idiocy”
  • The whole Italian vampire expulsion festival thing
  • Why didn’t she just yell at Edward?
  • “Interesting. I see nothing.”
  • Vampire smackdown

So there we are. I’m hooked and have no-one to blame but myself. This is what you get when you listen to your friends; I had taste before I met the Silvery One (OK some of it was dubious taste but it was all my own).

I just hope that in Eclipse there is more Michael Sheen. And more Anna Kendrick. And less brooding (hah – fat chance).

But it’s almost inevitable that I will find out.